Three Parts of a Person

 I had a dream last night that there were three parts of a person, represented as people:

Personality - This is how you are unconditionally.  In a vacuum, without influence, this is your true nature.

Experience - In the dream this person was often disregarded.  Useful and meaningful, but often conflicts with the Personality and the Salesman.

Salesman - I should say that a better name was given to the "Salesman",  but I forget what it was. Regardless, his essence is a salesman responsible for making you personality and experience relatable and likable.  He bent your personality to highlight it's qualities and stifled its less agreeable tendencies.  As for Mr. Experience, he was completely disrespected and only pulled out to dance for specific situations. 

I was in control of these characters in the dream and I saw that the Salesman was an asshole.  I realized that I gave him the power to drive and in the dream, felt sorry for the others.  I especially felt bad for experience because he looked like a prisoner. 

I woke up and wrote this down.  All three characters are necessary, but how often do we "sell out" to the salesman?

I thought at first it should be a democracy, but the Salesman would talk everybody into following his ideas.  Experience usually has a negative connotation (who ever learned lasting advice from GOOD choices?!) and Personality...well sometimes they cannot be trusted. 

No votes...there needs to be a boss...reluctantly that is me (otherwise the Salesman will convince me to appease everybody).  

I'll lift experience out of his hole and try my hardest to listen.  The others have been told he's equally important so I don't expect they'll be friends.

I'll listen to the Salesman because he never stops speaking.  My Personality says I should listen to him but he's led me wrong in the past an even betrayed Personality from time to time...so I'm skeptical of both of them.  Nonetheless, he's in tune with things so "trust but verify."

I'll focus on personality because he is truly me and is the only character that can bend and change over life.  Experience radically changed my Personality to the good, and sometimes to the bad.  But Personality at its core is a strange cocktail of chemicals in your brain, so Experience can only do so much. In the end though Personality is you, Experience and the Salesman are outsiders. 

Love Personality, listen to Experience, use the Salesman. 

This is what got me out of bed this morning.

Finding Peace in Effort

When I look for ways to improve myself, I look for a single change in habit or routine that improves multiple areas of my life.  My best example is the ongoing struggle with alcohol consumption. By cutting out this one habit it would improve energy, health, finances, etc.  I say "ongoing" because there are social and mental benefits to having a drink so I've never successfully quit drinking. 

During the pandemic we were facing the cancellation of our annual visit up north to Michigan and I was burning out at work. I wanted to still take a week off but could not bare the idea of sitting at home.  'Rona ultimately was the deciding factor of the cancellation, but family drama in Michigan and a rough patch at home took all the wind out of my sails and I had no energy to push on.

Focusing in on the rough patch, this was due to the prolonged work from home situation in a 1,500 sq ft house with three kids and my wife and I both working a side gig.  To fix this I needed space.  I had time, I needed a distraction and I had to get out from behind my computer. 

So I bought plans to build a backyard office and set to work.  There are two tales here that I'll summarize in two paragraphs below. 

Anxiety of Overcommitment

I underestimated the time, materials and money it takes to build a small 10'x10' office in the yard. The plan to build a space to ease my work from home and provide refuge has added to my ever-growing list of overcommitments.  I have one more thing to badger me as I hit snooze...one more thing to avoid in the evening with beer and Netflix.  I'm too far into the project to turn back, but each day I spend building is time away from the family and it's creating more of an issue than sharing a small house to raise a family and work.  My only recourse is to angrily power through and get this off my plate so I can focus on more meaningful things.  Peace in Effort

Finding Peace in Effort

I underestimated the time, materials and money it takes to build a small 10'x10' office in the yard.  It started with prepping the ground, then building the floor/base, then framing the walls, then building the trusses, then raising the frame, then raising the trusses, roofing, doors/windows, siding and deck.  I list all of these items because, for a first timer, each takes research and trial and error.  What I thought I could accomplish in a week, is now on week 4.  However, I reset my timing expectation and thought each section through allowing myself to customize as I see fit.  I have a grand vision and each night I get a step closer to realizing that vision.  I've learned an immense amount of information about construction...all the nuance is understood and I'm proud of each step.

I chose the latter path and by redefining my expectation of time, the project has been able to breathe, allowing for modifications and enhancements.  I'm truly proud of the vision I have for this space and slowly moving towards realizing it.  I can't wait for move-in day.